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If I Had Balls They Would Be Bigger Than Yours - Men's T-Shirt Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
$23.94
Sale price
$23.94
Regular price
$31.94
Statement Apparel – Premium Quality, Printed on Demand
Warning: once you feel this fabric, your other tees are getting benched. Gildan® Ultra Cotton meets studio-quality DTG printing. Comfort and color that actually last.
📸 Don’t let the mockup fool you – this isn’t just a tee. Get this design on 4 styles: T-Shirt, Long Sleeve, Sweatshirt & Hoodie. You pick, we produce. Simple as that.
What Makes It Hit Different
- 🎨 No Cheap Print Here – We don’t do vinyl or heat press. Pure DTG – ink in the fabric, color that lasts.
- 🧵 Quality on Another Level – Gildan® Ultra Cotton & Heavy Blend. Responsibly dyed, ridiculously soft.
- 👕 Your New Daily Driver – Relaxed classic fit with reinforced seams. Tear-away tag = no more neck itch.
- 🇺🇸 Wear It With Pride – Made with American cotton from the US Cotton Trust Protocol. Quality from the ground up.
Fabric Specs
- T-Shirt & Long Sleeve: 100% US cotton, 5.3–6 oz – soft, breathable, classic fit.
- Crewneck & Hoodie: 50/50 blend at 8 oz – pill-resistant fleece with spandex ribbing.
- Note: Sport Grey contains a 90/10 cotton/poly blend for color consistency.
Pick Your Color & Size
Find your size and pick your color – it’s that easy:
Available Colors
White
Black
Sand
Sport Grey
Navy
Light Pink
Royal
Pepper
Dark Heather
Forest Green
Light Blue
Gildan 5000 — Unisex T-Shirt
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 36 in (91.4 cm) |
| M | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| L | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| 2XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 3XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 4XL | 34 in (86.4 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
Gildan 2400 — Unisex Long Sleeve Tee
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 28 in (71 cm) | 36 in (92 cm) | 33.5 in (85 cm) |
| M | 29 in (74 cm) | 40 in (102 cm) | 35 in (89 cm) |
| L | 30 in (76 cm) | 44 in (112 cm) | 36.5 in (93 cm) |
| XL | 31 in (79 cm) | 48 in (122 cm) | 38 in (97 cm) |
| 2XL | 32 in (81 cm) | 52 in (132 cm) | 39.5 in (100 cm) |
| 3XL | 33 in (84 cm) | 56 in (142 cm) | 39.5 in (100 cm) |
| 4XL | 34 in (86 cm) | 60 in (152 cm) | 39 in (99 cm) |
Gildan 18000 — Unisex Sweatshirt
| Size | Length | Bust | Sleeve |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) | 33.5 in (85.09 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) | 34.5 in (87.63 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) | 35.5 in (90.17 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) | 36.5 in (92.71 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) | 37.5 in (95.25 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) | 38.5 in (97.79 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) | 39.5 in (100.33 cm) |
Gildan 18500 — Unisex Hoodie
| Size | Length | Bust |
|---|---|---|
| S | 27 in (68.6 cm) | 40 in (101.6 cm) |
| M | 28 in (71.1 cm) | 44 in (111.8 cm) |
| L | 29 in (73.7 cm) | 48 in (121.9 cm) |
| XL | 30 in (76.2 cm) | 52 in (132.1 cm) |
| 2XL | 31 in (78.7 cm) | 56 in (142.2 cm) |
| 3XL | 32 in (81.3 cm) | 60 in (152.4 cm) |
| 4XL | 33 in (83.8 cm) | 64 in (162.6 cm) |
- Review the color & size charts.
- Select your preferred options.
- Place your order – easy as 1-2-3.
Delivery & Handling
- ✅ Production Time: 1–3 business days.
- 📦 US Delivery: 3–7 business days.
- ⚡ US Rush Option: 3–5 business days.
- 🌍 Rest of World: 1–2 weeks.
Every item is made to order just for you. Please verify your size using the chart above. We can’t accept returns for sizing errors, but we’re always here to help if something isn’t right.
🛒 Discover more at ShirtCultCo.com – where great design meets great quality.